A birthday is the date on which a person is born, and a marking of the day a life begins. It is customary in many cultures to celebrate the anniversary of one's birthday in some way, for example by having a birthday party with classmates, friends, family, and even kids in which gifts are given. It is also customary to treat people specially on their birthday, either generally acceding to their wishes, or subjecting them to a rite of transition.
Birthday is considered a special day for the person, and so the person will often get special treatment from friends and family. This is especially true for children who cannot wait for their own special day. In contrast, many adults loathe the reminder that they are continually getting older. In addition to parties, people often get gifts on their birthday. Often, the honored person gets a "birthday hug" from friends and family.

I looked forward to my birthday from the first of June, counting down and circling the days on the calendar as it passed.There were no presents or big parties, it was just special because I got to wear a new dress to school and I could pass out candy to the children.I remember the trip to the store the day before my birthday, I would look at all the beautiful candy tins, it was hard to pick just one because all of them looked so pretty.It was very important to get a nice tin because later on it served as a pencil box and sometimes also a lunch box.I would look each tin over and over again, mine had to be the best, my mother would be patiently waiting ,giving me the extra time that I needed.

At school I was the most important person that day, my friends would hover around me and everyone wanted to be my best friend.I could not wait for the end of the day, when the teacher would call me to the front of the class and ask me to pass out the candy. I opened the Parry's Tin and went around placing a candy at each childs desk and quietly slipping two to my best friend. and giving the remaining candy to my teacher.I dont know if all the children felt like I did, but to me this was the most important part of my birthday, it was not about presents or new clothes. As I grew older this ritual died and gave way to more fun things like going out with my friends, and out to dinner. But when I look back, I still think I had more fun walking around the class room handing out the candy This made me feel very special and I was a princess for a DAY.

SURPRISE PACKAGE......

The door bell rings
Who can it be?
A uniformed man from Fedex
With a package adressed to me.

I tear open the package
Inside I see,
A small Aqua green box
With a white ribbon bow
Signed Tiffany & company.

My heart beats fast
From whom can it be?
A surprise gift from"J"
No! it cant be,
Because "surprise" is not in his vocabulary.

I slowly open the package
And there I see
A sterling silver chain with the initial"L"
In a aqua velvet pouch and a card for me.

It reads....
"Your thought of today, Happy Birthday"
Its from a young friend of mine.
Who looks up to me like a child of mine
And calls to say hello a dozen of times.

I smile and I think even if it is'nt from"J"
Its a beautiful gift and a wonderful thought.
Its something I will treasure and hold close to my heart.
Thank you Natashah.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KESHI.....&.. ( to all my blogger friends who are having a birthday )

Pick a star, any star
who needs candles when you have the sky
And make a birthday wish.
Wish for whatever you want,
Whatever your heart desires.
And know that whatever you wish for,
I wish the same for you
And wish for a way for it to come true.

A FRIEND...


What makes a friend
A friend.

Is someone that everyone needs
A friend .

Is that special one
A friend .

Is someone you tell EVERYTHING
A friend.

Is someone you never lie to
A friend.

Can a boy or a girl be
A friend.

Is someone that is always there
A friend.

Will always listen to you
A friend.

Always has input to give
A friend .

Will never leave you in the dust
A friend.

Will help you through the thick and thin
A friend.

Will always stand by your side
A friend .

Will never let you down
A friend .

Will always steer you on the right path
A Friend.

Is someone everyone needs
A friend.

What would you do if you didnt have a friend?

EGG TRAGEDY

There is a saying "See no evil" "Hear no evil" and "speak no evil" and it is always portrayed by three monkeys closing their mouth, ears and eyes. Sometimes in life I think we just dont see, hear or speak about things that we need to. It is very easy to look the other way and pretend it is not happening when we dont want to be bothered. By doing this we somehow feel it is ok. Is it ok to look the other way or point fingers at someone who is down in life, is having a hard time and maybe not doing as well as you are. I think it is selfishness that makes us do this. We feel that as long as it is not happening to us or our immediate family , we should not worry about it. I think as a society we should look out for one another and lend a helping hand no matter how small. Sometimes all that is needed is a kind word or a gesture.

10 THINGS THAT I MISS ABOUT MY MOTHERS COOKING:
I have been tagged by Sumitha from Kitchen wonders to continue this meme...

1... My mother passed away a long time ago. I always remember how she made things go a long
way because we were a lot of kids and so she had to really stretch her budget. everyday she
would go to the market and buy fresh vegetables , meat and fish were reserved for special
days, her dishes were simple but tasty.

2. I loved the custard she used to make, served with fresh fruit.

3. I miss the green gram dal Payasam she used to make on our birthdays, topped with coconut pieces & sweetened with jaggery. It was delicious and I wished everyday was my birthday.

4. My mother made delicious mango pickle, with small whole mangoes, shredded mangoes and with just mango pieces. each one having its own taste. she would marinate them in salt in a ceramic jar . I remember taking the salted pieces and eating them up. I just could not wait for it to be seasoned.

5. I miss the home made chappathis and puris, for some reason hers tasted so much better . I also miss the different breakfast items also, now for the most part it is cereal. I try to make an indian breakfast on weekends.

6. My mother used to try to make home made cakes. even though it turned out really bad, she never gave up and kept trying till she got it perfect. she did not have a good baking oven that we have now. I have not attempted to bake a cake from scratch like my mom. I miss those small sweet cakes.

7. I miss the coconut filled pancakes, and banana fritters , it was always ready when we came from school. After eating a couple you were ready to go out and play.

8. My mother made a really good vegetable stew, which was really tasty with appams. Also really delicious vegetable and meat cutlets.

9. On special occasions she would go all out and make a really nice chicken curry, the aroma itself was enough to make you hungry and beg for more. I have never been able to duplicate that exact flavor.

10. I did not know how to cook when I was first married. I would call my mother several times asking for recipes and ideas, how to fix a dish that I had messed up, because I had no time to make another. she would always encourage me and tell me not to worry and that in due time I would be able to cook well. When I got married and had my first apartment, my mom came over and helped me set up the kitchen, labeling all the spices and stocking my pantry. I was so scared because "J" was coming from India and was used to eating really good food, and I did not know how to cook. My mother stood beside me and showed me how. wrote down a few easy recipes for me and told me to take one day at a time. she passed away two months after that, but I learnt after making many mistakes and throwing whole chickens down the trash shute. Today I can say I am a reasonably good cook but I sure miss all of my mothers cooking just not ten.

I am going to tag..Keshi & Geetha carry out this meme.

TRIBUTE TO MY FATHER ON FATHERS DAY

Fathers day is a day of commemoration and celebration of Dad. It is a day to honor your father. Happy Fathers Day To All The Dads in the world.

When I think of my father
I remember a man of small stature, soft spoken
A silent provider, immaculately dressed
Shoes shining bright.
Always reading a newspaper, smoking a pipe,
Occasionally playing the Harmonica,
Watching wrestling matches into the wee hours
of the night.

I saw love in his eyes
Always giving without compromise.
A man of few words, confident and fair
Even though he was always away
I knew he still cared.

Proud of his children, and
he went to great lengths
To give us what we needed depriving himself.
He taught me the things in life that
I needed to know.
He was the tower of strength, source of love
Even in the midst of my imperfections and pitfalls
He accepted me and helped me grow.

I remember the train rides to and fro
And helping me with my home work because
I did not know.
He was a man who enforced discipline
Yet lenient in some
My mothers best friend
Who was there to the end.

I am sad that he is no more
But he lives in my heart
He will always be remembered
Not only today but forever .
I am honored to have known this man
I wish you were here Dad.

So many gods, so many creeds, So many paths that wind and wind, While just the art of being kind Is all the sad world needs." Wilcox"

There are so many that don't realize that the value of our lives is best measured not by the worldly possessions we've acquired, but rather by the wisdom we share, the hope we inspire, the tears we wipe, and the hearts we touch. The happiness and lasting contentment we get in our lives are not to be found in what "we have," but rather in what "we are." Everything we do affects not only our own life, but it touches others, too.

The Movie "Namesake" revolves around the Ganguli family who moved from Kolkata to New York and their shifting from one land to the other brings to mind a lifelong balancing act to mend to an altogether a new and different world without forgetting the old. Although the parents Ashoke and Ashima yearn for the family and culture that enveloped them in India, they take pride in the opportunities their sacrifices have afforded their children. Paradoxically their son Gogol is torn between finding his own unique identity without losing his heritage. Even Gogol's name represents the family's journey into the unknown.
Director Mira Nair utters her views on the story of her film saying, "Namesake encompasses in a deep humane way the tale of millions of us who have left one home for another, who have known what it means to combine the old ways with the new world, who have left the shadow of our parents to find ourselves for the first time."

I had read this book some time ago and can relate to some of the feelings that the family had to go through. Children of Immigrant parents do have problems trying to retain the traditions and cultures taught to them at home and at the same time trying to assimilate with the outside world.
The children are often called ABCD ( American born confused Desi) .I think along with the children parents are also confused at times. Me being an immigrant knows how difficult it is to retain Indian values , culture and tradition and at the same time allowing the influx of American culture. This conflict of cultures start even before the child is born. First the parent had to be comfortable with who they were and how they were going to make a foreign land their home. There is always that yearning to go back to your roots and to the place you called home.

From the moment the child is born there is a conflict between being Indian and being American, is the child American because of the birth place or is the child Indian, being born to Indian parents.Starting with the name, I wanted my children to retain an Indian identity, hoping it would define who they are and who they would become. I wanted short but meaningful names, names others could pronounce and something they would be comfortable with and at the same time trying to incorporate middle names of grandparents keeping up with tradition.

Through the growing years trying to get them accustomed to eating indian food from mild to spicy not wanting them to miss out on all the different flavors and at the same time trying out American recipes so they would learn to appreciate both. Welcoming all their friends Indian and American , playing Indian music alongside American Pop so they will know both . When it came to clothes we had to teach what was appropriate and what was not, not following what everyone was doing , at the same time being able to fit in . Setting down rules and letting them know what was expected of them even though it did not look cool to their American friends. On our many trips to India we would bring back Indian outfits, making them feel comfortable in them and explaining that it was cool to be seen in them on special occasions. so much so that they feel good in them now. The Indian Jewellery that my daughter once thought was too yellow, now adorns her neck, she has learnt to appreciate the inticate work and the beautiful stones and asks for more.

Through watching Indian movies I tried to incorporate a sense of belonging, to know the other side of the world they live in and to like indian music. We made an effort to bridge the gap between the two countries by taking them to India whenever we could, to allow them to see a country they belong to and will always be tied to even though they dont live there .
I made them see India through my eyes by always telling them different stories about my childhood. Wearing western clothes when I am with them, or when I go to pick them up from school so that I am like the other moms, not wanting their friends to tease them.

We made frequent trips on the weekend to "Little India" a place in Orange county where the streets are lined with Indian Restaurants, Grocery stores and stores displaying a magnificent array of jewellery. Most of the people around you were from India and it somehow made you feel at home. The day usually ended with a nice hot Masala Dosa and the children enjoyed a nice cool glass of Lassi, and as always we left with bags of groceries and Indian food and the kids and me slept all the way back. In the beginning the children detested the long weekend trip but later on looked forward to it because it had become part of who they were.

Children do go through a hard time growing up , trying to mix both cultures , we hope we have taught them both and they will never forget who they really are. I think only when they are adults will they appreciate and understand what we were trying to do.It is not easy to start a new life in a foreign land, we all leave the country we love, out of necessity and to better ourselves but nothing can take away who we really are. No matter where life takes them and makes of them I hope they will always remember their roots and understand what we were trying to achieve.

CITY OF SIMI VALLEY

I thought it would be nice to share some facts about Simi Valley , a place I have called home for the last 16 years. Previously I had lived in large cities like Michigan and Chicago , so it was a nice change when we came here. It is a really small town located about 40 miles NW of Los angeles. It has been ranked as the safest city in America for a number of years. When we first came here the population was about 100,000 now it has grown to aprox 110,000. It is a beautiful place surrounded by hills but also is at a high risk for wild fires. We also are at a high risk for earthquakes because of the many earthquake faults that surround us. Southern california has a high fire risk ,usually the hot weather and the high winds cause several fires to sweep across the hills .Last year the whole city was surrounded by fire, we were very lucky not to have been harmed. From our bedroom window we could see the fire on the hills, it was an awesome but scary sight.

Simi valley was once inhabited by Chumash Indians. The word simi valley comes from the word "Shimiji" which means little white clouds. Simi Valley is home to the Ronald Reagen Library and also many western movies have been shot here, also tv shows like Little House on the Prarie and Mash and the 2003 Movie Dr Seuss " Cat in the Hat" . For transportation we have Metro buses, and the Amtrack and Metrolink trains run through the city. Simi Valley average temperature is 60 degrees F. The average low temperature is 51 degrees F. The average high temperature is 77 degrees F. We also get the santa Anna winds which usually shreds all the leaves .the banana leaf looks fringed and most of the weaker plants fall to the ground.
Even with fires and earthquakes it is still a nice place to live in, no place is perfect and we have to make the best of what we have. I have posted a few pictures of the hills and the fires.

MY GUEST MAP

I click on on my guest map and what do I see
Just Chet, Madhu and Starry-Thats me.
The whole world looks so bare
Are there any people out there?
I know I have many friends
Because they care to comment
on the posts that they read.
So would you be kind enough to place your pin
on my map for the whole world to see
So the next time I click on my map
There will be a seaful of people
Just smiling back at me.

P.S. The guest map is down below to your left.

FROM A DISTANCE.....

I was driving home last evening and heard an old song by Bette Midler and was thinking about the words and it seemed so true that from a distance everything seems all right it is only when you are near do you see the real plight. It is so easy sometimes to give advice or to comment on a situation from a distance . I thought I would share the lyrics with you.


From a Distance

From a distance the world looks blue and green,
And the snow-capped mountains white.
From a distance the ocean meets the stream,
And the eagle takes to flight
From a distance, there is harmony,
And it echoes through the land.
It’s the voice of hope, it’s the voice of peace,
It’s the voice of every man.
From a distance we all have enough,
And no one is in need
And there are no guns, no bombs, and no disease,
No hungry mouths to feed.
From a distance we are instruments
Marching in a common band.
Playing songs of hope, playing songs of peace.
They’re the songs of every man.
God is watching us from a distance.
From a distance you look like my friend,
Even though we are at war
From a distance I just cannot comprehend
What all this fighting is for
From a distance there is harmony,
And it echoes through the land.
And it’s the hope of hopes, it’s the love of loves,
It’s the heart of every man.
It’s the hope of hopes, it’s the love of loves.
This is the song of every man.

GIRLS DONT FLY KITES...

School has closed for the summer, all the school books and uniforms are put away never to be seen again. My brothers are in the backyard huddled together, through the spaces between them I see different colored tissue papers flying about, glue and thinly shaved Bamboo sticks, and Reels of thread. I know what this is all about and I want "in" on this party. I go outside and beg to be included but I am not .One of them says" dont touch anything, you can only watch and anyway Girls dont fly kites". I agree,but feeling disappointed I drag my feet to the washing stone which was a few feet away, resting my chin on my knees I watch my brothers put together this kite with as much precision as building a plane.

Most people are happy just making one kite but my brothers were driven to make the biggest, fastest and the best kite. There were little kites, big kites, fast kites and slow kites. Kites for high winds and kites for low winds and when there was no wind they just admired their creation.
The kite was made of tissue paper and had a central spine and a bow made of bamboo. Sometimes these bamboo sticks came in handy to my mother when punishment was in order.The difference in the kites lie in the patterns and colors used.There were simple geometric shapes and designs and circles of contrasting colors.The front was more beautiful than the back because it faced the worldand had to be the best. Final touches to the kite include eyes of silver or gold and anything else you may fancy. After a couple of agonizing hours the kite is ready and is set aside to dry.

Out comes the reels of white thread, but it is not enough to use just plain thread, something called Manjha had to be applied to the thread. one of my brothers was busy grinding the glass into powder while the other was mixing a concoction of ingredients which was a much guarded secret.This I learnt later on was to make the thread strong. The thread was dyed a beautiful orange and set out to dry. T he whole day has passed , my mother is calling us for dinner, my brothers make a quick stop at the bathroom to get clean, hide the bruises and stains on their hands and pretend that nothing special was happenning. I played along not wanting to fall out of grace with them.I wanted to fly a kite.

The next day I see my brothers looking up at the sky. Is it windy enough? is it going to rain? these thoughts race through my mind, hoping the latter would not occur because I just wanted to fly a kite. There is nothing more beautiful than looking up at the sky on a warm summer day and seeing the kites of different shapes and sizes. There were square, triangular and diamond shaped kites. Some with fishtails and some with no tails and some with tails that looked like colored spaghetti just floating in the wind. Down below the grass was green and the Mayflower tree provided the shade and a carpetful of orange colored flowers.

I ask if I can hold the reel, but my brother says no, you need a steady hand. From where I am sitting I can see the glass coated thread glistening in the sun and being released in sudden long and short spurts depending how high the kite was and where it was in location to the other kites. The goal was to cut the other kites and the last kite flying was the winner. There were the kite runners whose sole purpose was to scramble over rooftops and across fields to catch the falling kite. My brothers wanted no part of that, they just wanted to win.Suddenly I see my brother cut off two opponents and was seething with joy but seconds later his ego came spiralling down into the trees and electric wires.

The kite is very inexpensive made out of tissue and Bamboo but it transcends countries, cultures, religion and brings people together and also lends a competitive spirit. It holds a special place in my heart, to me it meant freedom to just fly away and explore the world and most of all to spend a nice summer day with my brothers. I am humbled when I look up at the limitless sky and am reminded that I am just an insignificant speck in the Universe.

Six Weird Things About Me !


What you need to do:

1..Post a blog with six weird things about you.

2..Tag six people at the end of your post, victimize them unawares and pass the buck.

3..Post a comment in their blogs letting them know that they have been tagged.and ask them to
visit your blog for info.



I have been Tagged by Sophie so here I go.

1. I always loved to write and encouraged my children to do so. I always thought that people
would laugh at what I wrote and never did, untill I started to Blog. Now my family encourages
me. I never thought I would ever get the courage to let others read what I write.

2..I am scared of getting into the water. Even though we had a swimming pool I never
learned to swim . The weird thing is that I love water and can spend endless hours at
the beach, watch the waves and enjoy the serenity that comes with just looking at the water. I admire people who can swim and surf .I made sure my kids learned how to swim but I
lacked the courage to learn.

3..I love to sit under the stars and enjoy basking in the moonlight. Hence the name Starry Nights. It is so Romantic. Theres nothing better I rather do. I wish I could go up in space and look down on the earth. I am intrigued by the Universe.

4..I love to do things around the house and am handy with the Tool Box. I can fix a lot of Stuff and am good at plumbing jobs also. I think I learnt these things watching my brothers while I was growing up.

5.. I am a Hopeless Romantic. I cry at sad and happy movies. love to read Romantic Novels and poems, candlelight dinners and a glass of wine. I married a person who is just the opposite. In a way it is true that opposites attract.

6..I really dont enjoy good food. My family think it is sad because I would just as much enjoy a meal at home than go to some fancy restaurant. They think it is the weirdest thing of all. what do you think?



I am going to Tag

Scribblez
Chandni
Jac
Anu
Madhu
Prash